Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
