If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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