too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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