I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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