they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
