i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize