she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
