Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Even the bartender felt bad for me
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I am mentally ready for anal.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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