so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
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He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
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Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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