I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
