I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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