Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I would fuck him just for his dog
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
