I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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