Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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