ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
