Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i permit you to call me
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize