That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Enjoy the penises
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
