i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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