So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
