check it out our google latitudes are spooning
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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