dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
