Don't make out with my wife yet
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Boobs are out for the taking
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
