i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize