Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
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I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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