You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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