it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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