batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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