I just pynch a tree in the face
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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