he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize