im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
