You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
My bed smells like the plague
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
