Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
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