I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.