i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
