did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
