We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
hell yes lets make some ravioli
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
