Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
