Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(225): View more from Louisiana

Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min

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(586): View more from Michigan

Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?

(1-920): View more from Wisconsin

no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?

(920): View more from Wisconsin

he wasn't. neither were you.

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The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Read it at the TFLN blog
(415): View more from California

Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.

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(305): View more from Florida

We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.

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(337): View more from Louisiana

YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.

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