As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
