its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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