i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Randomize
