i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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