why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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