btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
