I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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