If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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