My brain says no but my pants say off.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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