No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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