we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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