she woke up with a sticky ear
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
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