i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
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