i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
